Why Do Late-Night Hosts Always Keep Their Desks on the Right?

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old crocus-yellow neckties

“(I don’t suppose a writing man ever really gets rid of his old crocus-yellow neckties. Sooner or later, I think, they show up in his prose, and there isn’t a hell of a lot he can do about it.)“

—J.D. Salinger, Seymour—An Introduction, 1959.

very early-blooming parenthesis

“I privately say to you, old friend (unto you, really, I’m afraid), please accept from me this unpretentious bouquet of very early-blooming parenthesis: (((()))).”

—J.D. Salinger, Seymour—An Introduction, 1959.

Plaintive Jewish Brown

“In one or two conveniently describable ways, his eyes were similar to mine, to Les’s, and to Boo Boo’s in that (a) the eyes of this bunch could all be rather bashfully described as extra-dark oxtail in color, or Plaintive Jewish Brown, and (b) we all ran to half circles, and, in a couple of cases, outright bags.”

—J.D. Salinger, Seymour—An Introduction, 1959.

the written word

“It was a day, God knows, not only of rampant signs and symbols but of wildly extensive communication via the written word.”

—J.D. Salinger, Raise High the Roof Beam, Carpenters, 1955.

a lemon-yellow mark

“Certain heads, certain colors and textures of human hair leave permanent marks on me. Other things, too. Charlotte once ran away from me, outside the studio, and I grabbed her dress to stop her, to keep her near me. A yellow cotton dress I loved because it was too long for her. I still have a lemon-yellow mark on the palm of my right hand.”

—J.D. Salinger, Raise High the Roof Beam, Carpenters, 1955.

These Matches Were Stolen from Bob and Edie Burwick’s House

“Mrs. Silsburn examined the match folder. On its outside cover, in gold letters on a crimson background, were printed the words ‘These Matches Were Stolen from Bob and Edie Burwick’s House.’ ‘Darling,’ Mrs. Silsburn said, shaking her head. ‘Really darling.’. . .
    ‘We had a whole bunch of them made up last year,’ the Lieutenant said. ‘Be amazed, actually, how it keeps you from running out of matches.’ ”

—J.D. Salinger, Raise High the Roof Beam, Carpenters, 1955.

Who dat say who dat when I say who dat?

Thank you Alex Cook!

the fleur de lis

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“While there are worse NFL team logos, the Viking character cannot compete with the long (and I mean long) iconic history of the fleur de lis.”

—Prtty Shtty, “AFC and NFC Conference Championship predictions”, January 22, 2010.

Poor Hawaii

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